Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Learning About Adoption

As I said in my last post, we started our adoption educatinal seminars this month. I have enjoyed them immensely for several reasons. I already spoke about the first class in the last post, so I'll go on to the second class. We had an adoptive father come to speak to us about the waiting that's involved. He and his wife waiting 2 years before they were matched. It was great to hear about his struggles and frustration of waiting, but it's also good to hear him and the two ladies from the previous week talk about how it is so easy to look back know and see how the wait was worth it and designed how God intended. He had a few options prior to the baby they were matched with but decided that those other babies weren't right for them. When they see those other children now they look at them and can see why their child is their child, and why the children they decided not to adopt were meant for another couple (they all get together each year for a picnic). Anyways, until the phrase "When it's meant to happen, it will" coming from these other adoptive parents, I HATED that saying, or sayings like it. It wasn't so much the saying, it was the knowing that the person who it was coming from was trying to give advice in an area they knew nothing about.

One other thing he mentioned last week that made me feel so much better was while they were waiting to adopt, his wife could be around some mothers and their kids and not others. That made me feel SOOOO much better, because I couldn't understand why it is no problem for me to hang out with some mothers and their kids and not others. It was good to know that maybe this is a normal feeling.

Last night we had a birthmother speak who had just given birth 6 weeks ago. The adoptive parents were there to speak to, and it was an awesome experience. It was so good to see both sides of it.

I also realized that I am not yet in any sort of excitement phase about adoption. People keep asking me if I'm excited and of course I say yes. But the thing is, I'm keeping my emotions calm because I know that once we get certified and we are officially on the list, it will be an extremely emotionally charged time. Right now, I just want to enjoy the things I have going on in my life and not be consumed on thoughts of adoption, because I know I will have plenty of time to be excited, worried, to cry, to hope, to be let down, then one day to have our baby and it all be worth it.

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