Sooooo, I quit the job I was determined to keep for a year! I decided I was going to be miserable staying there. I would prefer to work nights on one hand because it is much less stressful. But I would prefer not to work nights because all I end up doing on my off days is sleeping around the clock. So I decided not to stay and I went through a few other interviews over the last couple of days and decided to take a job working at an allergy clinic. I fully expect it to be low stress, and it is Monday-Friday. The money is not as good but no M-F nursing job will ever pay what floor nurses get.
We also finally have our schedule for our adoption orientation. We will be going through seminars every Tuesday from the end of Feb to the end of March. I will keep you posted on how everything goes!
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
New Job
Well I'm two weeks into my new job at UMC. I'm working on a cardiovascular floor, but we get a lot of other types of patients also. I've only had two days on the floor because the first week and part of the next week were all classes. It's going to take a little bit of time before I get back into the swing of things as far as working on an inpatient unit. The pace is fast, the patients are sick, and the computer charting is tedious. The good thing is they stick to their 1:4 nurse to patient ratio. Occasionally each nurse must take a 5th patient if they are short a nurse, but 5 is still better than 7 or 8. It's also nice to only work 3 days every week. I don't think I'm going to love the job because of the stress, but I see it as a necessary step in my career. I'm glad I took a little time off the floor in my last job but it's better for me to go back to the floor for another year or year and a half. It's my new year's resolution to stay at UMC for 12 months!
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Soapbox Moment
Infertility is a topic I find many people don't know how to approach. I'm often at a loss myself and I'm the one going through it. Before I went through this experience I would not have had any idea what to say, and I surely would have said the wrong thing. Now I know what the "wrong" things are to say after having had them said to me. I think this article would have been helpful to me if I had a friend going through this. Here is some information that I could relate to very well.
How Can I Help? The Dos And The Don'ts Of Support
By Diane Clapp, BSN, RN and Merle Bombardieri, LICSW
Coping with Infertility can be extremely difficult for the family and friends of the couple going through infertility. As with any crisis it is difficult to know what to say. Because infertility is such a sensitive topic it is important to understand what you can and cannot say.
Let's start with what doesn't help, because the more you continue to say the wrong thing inadvertently, the deeper the rift will be between you and the couple. There is a universal list of No-No's that most infertile couples agree on. The following do's and don'ts should help you support the individual or couple who is struggling with infertility.
Don't Try to minimize the problem by saying, "Don't worry. At least you have each other and don't have cancer."
Do Listen to what the couple has to say about their experience and express empathy for their difficulties.
Don't Give medical advice or doctor referrals without being asked or hearing the couple say they are looking for new information or referrals.
Do Tell the couple know that you'll be happy to listen to any details they want to share with you and that you would like to offer support during any procedures by a phone call or by offering to go with them to a medical appointment.
Don't Expect the couple to act happy about attending baby showers, christenings and other family events that feature pregnant women and new babies.
Do Give them plenty of opportunity to decide whether to attend an event or whether to come late or leave early. They will not feel the need to avoid babies forever, but less contact right now may be a necessary part of their healing process.
Don't Start a discussion about infertility without paying attention to timing and to the couple's openness.
Do Choose a time when the couple's privacy is assured and ask the couple if they would like to talk. Couples experiencing infertility often feel out of control. Your letting them choose whether and when to talk about it gives them back some control.
Don't Offer unsolicited stories about others who have been successful at treatment or adoption. DO Tell them if they are ever interested you could put them in touch with a couple willing to talk about their infertility experience or adoption process. Let them decide whether they want to pursue that information. As a parent, family member, or friend, you want to make it better for the couple, to take away the pain. But probably the greatest gift you can give your loved one or friend is to be a listener, a sounding board. Instead of erasing the pain, you can diminish it by your caring. One of the hardest questions to ask someone is, "How can I help you?" It is such a difficult question because you should be prepared for their answer and not the answer that you think they will say or should say. To ask that question and to trust the response that you hear is a powerful step in your efforts to help the couple struggling with this kind of crisis.
Reference: http://www.resolve.org/site/PageServer?pagename=cop_tainf_jffaf
How Can I Help? The Dos And The Don'ts Of Support
By Diane Clapp, BSN, RN and Merle Bombardieri, LICSW
Coping with Infertility can be extremely difficult for the family and friends of the couple going through infertility. As with any crisis it is difficult to know what to say. Because infertility is such a sensitive topic it is important to understand what you can and cannot say.
Let's start with what doesn't help, because the more you continue to say the wrong thing inadvertently, the deeper the rift will be between you and the couple. There is a universal list of No-No's that most infertile couples agree on. The following do's and don'ts should help you support the individual or couple who is struggling with infertility.
Don't Try to minimize the problem by saying, "Don't worry. At least you have each other and don't have cancer."
Do Listen to what the couple has to say about their experience and express empathy for their difficulties.
Don't Give medical advice or doctor referrals without being asked or hearing the couple say they are looking for new information or referrals.
Do Tell the couple know that you'll be happy to listen to any details they want to share with you and that you would like to offer support during any procedures by a phone call or by offering to go with them to a medical appointment.
Don't Expect the couple to act happy about attending baby showers, christenings and other family events that feature pregnant women and new babies.
Do Give them plenty of opportunity to decide whether to attend an event or whether to come late or leave early. They will not feel the need to avoid babies forever, but less contact right now may be a necessary part of their healing process.
Don't Start a discussion about infertility without paying attention to timing and to the couple's openness.
Do Choose a time when the couple's privacy is assured and ask the couple if they would like to talk. Couples experiencing infertility often feel out of control. Your letting them choose whether and when to talk about it gives them back some control.
Don't Offer unsolicited stories about others who have been successful at treatment or adoption. DO Tell them if they are ever interested you could put them in touch with a couple willing to talk about their infertility experience or adoption process. Let them decide whether they want to pursue that information. As a parent, family member, or friend, you want to make it better for the couple, to take away the pain. But probably the greatest gift you can give your loved one or friend is to be a listener, a sounding board. Instead of erasing the pain, you can diminish it by your caring. One of the hardest questions to ask someone is, "How can I help you?" It is such a difficult question because you should be prepared for their answer and not the answer that you think they will say or should say. To ask that question and to trust the response that you hear is a powerful step in your efforts to help the couple struggling with this kind of crisis.
Reference: http://www.resolve.org/site/PageServer?pagename=cop_tainf_jffaf
Monday, December 8, 2008
My Latest Realization
I had a major realization over the last couple weeks. I've lived my life and aimed my career at trying to achieve the same level of financial comfort my parents enjoyed while I was growing up. In the back of my mind without ever fully realizing it, I'd always thought that success in my life would mean being able to afford all that my parents could afford and being able to provide my children with the same opportunities they provided me. For example, growing up we had a large house with large bedrooms, a pool, a treehouse, and a nice yard and garden. I was able to travel to Australia, Hawaii, and Italy before I was even in high school. But now I know all that is not necessary. The only thing necessary is love. My children will have fewer opportunities, smaller bedrooms, and no grassy yard, but they will have more love than they will know what to do with.
Soooo, anyone want to buy a house with 4 bedrooms, a pool, and a beautiful rose garden??? Haha. We think we may want to sell the house once the market is a little better.
Soooo, anyone want to buy a house with 4 bedrooms, a pool, and a beautiful rose garden??? Haha. We think we may want to sell the house once the market is a little better.
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Thanksgiving
I saw a sign the other day that said something like, "Thank God for dirty dishes. It means we had food to eat." Those weren't the exact words, but close.
I'm so glad I read this on a sign the other day, because it reminded me of how I take all the little things for granted. It reminded me of how easily I can complain about things like the dishes or laundry, when instead of being frustrated I could choose to be thankful.
I'm so glad I read this on a sign the other day, because it reminded me of how I take all the little things for granted. It reminded me of how easily I can complain about things like the dishes or laundry, when instead of being frustrated I could choose to be thankful.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Loyalty
I can't believe it. Our garage door was left open on accident again last night, and our dogs stayed put AGAIN! If only we as humans had the same loyalty to one another and to God as our dogs have to us. It is amazing.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
TTC
Yes, folks, that is that category I fit into right now. Trying to Conceive. I've had an emotional month in that area. My nurse practitioner has assured me as best she can that I am not pregnant simply because of "chance", and that there is nothing actually wrong with me other than I need help ovulating and I need to take hormones so my body can support a pregnancy. I think I know of at least 10 present or former (i.e. high school and college) friends who are pregnant. It seems like every time I open up my facebook page, another friend has announced her pregnancy. December will bring us to 12 months of TTC. I don't have the assurance I thought I would have that we should pursue adoption. I wish I did, because now all I have are unknowns. Can I get pregnant? If so, how long will it take? So I am pretty sure God would like to teach me to be so thankful for all that I have in my life. I try every day.
I don't really buy into the "God wants me to be thankful for what I have before He will allow me to have a child" idea. I just don't think God works like that. I think that's a human way of rationalizing why we don't get what we want right away. And if that's how He works, that's fine. I'll find out in Heaven. But I'd much rather try to hear what God is teaching me without trying to figure out why things happen when they happen and why. I think being a child of God is much more about the "what" than the "why".
I don't really buy into the "God wants me to be thankful for what I have before He will allow me to have a child" idea. I just don't think God works like that. I think that's a human way of rationalizing why we don't get what we want right away. And if that's how He works, that's fine. I'll find out in Heaven. But I'd much rather try to hear what God is teaching me without trying to figure out why things happen when they happen and why. I think being a child of God is much more about the "what" than the "why".
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